Positive Fanatics » Humor

IKEA – Midsommar in Schweden

Kymm — Fri, 19 Jun 2009 21:51:26 +0000

IKEA Dialogues

Positive Fanatics — Tue, 23 Dec 2008 17:09:29 +0000

Found reference to IKEA Dialogues on Minor Tweaks at IKEAFANS – hysterical! IKEA Anna is always fun, but Tom Bartlett give Anna a run for her money in 13 separate dialogues with Anna, and (hopefully) counting….

Anna: The IKEA business idea is: “We shall offer a wide-range of well-designed, functional home furnishing products at prices so low that as many people as possible will be able to afford them.”

Me: Wow. Did you memorize that?

Anna: A good education is important, but I’m not here to talk about that. Let’s talk about IKEA instead.

Me: You are all business, aren’t you?

Anna: Learn facts and figures that make up our organization on the adjacent page that I’m opening for you now.

Me: Okay, I can take a hint. I’m going to say goodbye now.

Anna: Bye then! It was very nice talking to you!

Me: Likewise, Anna.

Anna: That’s me! How can I help?

Good stuff. Check it out at Minor Tweaks.

And a thank you to Armand Frasco for the mention on Notebookism. We’re sincerely honored to have the privilege of carrying on at Positive Fanatics!

The IKEA Game

Positive Fanatics — Thu, 04 Dec 2008 13:00:54 +0000

Ever played? It’s frustratingly difficult! The IKEA Game

Match the names from a list of 5 to the type of furniture it is. See how many YOU get right! So, why would one torture oneself repeatedly with a silly online IKEA game? I’ll tell you why:

I’m a Swedish Furniture God. Who knew?

Saint Tokig

Armand Frasco — Sun, 25 Jun 2006 17:56:00 +0000

” I was in a goofy mood today so I whipped up old Saint Tokig, the patron saint
of IKEA. For those that pray for a local IKEA store, here’s the dude to talk to.
Feel free to download him and print him up, or whatever…”

Jen @ OH,IKEA!

Funny stuff from Ikea: Bästis hooks

Armand Frasco — Fri, 26 May 2006 18:00:00 +0000

Check out this witty composition by Ainurel in Sweden.
A Viking cat…err..cap?

“Funny stuff from Ikea: Bästis hooks”

FLICKR link

IKEA Nose

Armand Frasco — Mon, 06 Mar 2006 06:00:00 +0000

“Ikea Nose” by Tifty’s Art on FLICKR.
© All rights reserved. Used with permission.

[Thanks John!]

Vikings are just Swedish Pirates

Armand Frasco — Tue, 28 Feb 2006 07:00:00 +0000

Funny shirt by Oliver J. Moss at Threadless:

LINK

Just got this excited email from Amanda H:

My friends and I always included IKEA as part of our bay area shopping get- away
and now that the sac location is a mere hour away vs. four we will be going
more often and I am sure our stylin’ houses will reflect that. I can’t say my
husband is as excited, but that is understandable since he has never experienced
IKEA. One trip and I am positive he will change his level of enthusiasm. Thanks
so much for coming to our area, I am one excited girl and future frequent
shopper!!!!!

IKEA Claims Another 10,000 Lifestyles

Armand Frasco — Fri, 24 Feb 2006 06:00:00 +0000

Here’s a classic from the Onion:

ATLANTA—IKEA, the rapidly growing Swedish retailer of inexpensive home furnishings, claimed another 10,000 American lifestyles in 2003, according to a report released Tuesday by the Center for Interior Design Control.

“This epidemic of self-assembled, clean-lined modernist furniture is still largely contained to densely populated urban areas, but the danger exists that it will spread to other regions throughout America,” CIDC spokesman Chris Greeves said Tuesday. “At the rate it’s moving, our nation could suffer European levels of Scandinavian design within a decade.”

Greeves said IKEA is not easily controlled, as it spreads largely through word of mouth.

“It passes between rooms until it has infested not only your living room, but also your 1.5 bathrooms, your cleanly appointed kitchen, and then your entire sun-drenched, open-plan loft apartment. In the most extreme cases, it will even spread to the string-light-decorated rooftop patio overlooking your recently gentrified neighborhood.”

LINK

[Thanks Jen!]

…

An email from Michael O.

“I have been to the Schaumberg store several times, Burlington, Philadelphia, Newark and Pittsburgh, and could never understand why there wasn’t one in the metro Detroit area. I plan on taking the day off of work for the opening.”

Ikea Bedroom Improvements

Armand Frasco — Tue, 21 Feb 2006 06:30:00 +0000

Apartment Therapy’s Clark ov Saturn calls IKEA about their round bed.

View.

Operation GET MORE IVAR

Armand Frasco — Fri, 30 Dec 2005 06:45:00 +0000

NEWS FLASH! From Major Clanger’s LiveJournal comes this situation report:

ENEMY FORCES: The Minions of IKEA, the Milton Keynes Nine-Dimensional Roundabout Manifold.

SITUATION: Enhancement of home base command bunker (cover name: ‘study’) requires acquisition of additional IVAR shelving.

MISSION: Proceed to the new IKEA encampment at Milton Keynes, procure appropriate IVAR items, and exfiltrate.

AFTER-ACTION REPORT:
Initial approach to target was compromised when GPS nav/attack system
failed to lock on to target coordinates (i.e. the bloody store has its
own, new, postcode). However, local friendlies (codename: ‘AA’) had
placed additional signage. During terminal approach, target facility
was highly visible owing to (i) vast and immense blueness, and (ii)
queue for entry. However, this proved less troublesome than expected as
Borg-like IKEAdrones had been deployed on traffic-marshalling duties…

…POST-ATTACK RECCE: Regrettably, the target (or an
alternate facility) will have to be revisited in order to acquire the
final key objectives (226 cm x 30 cm IVAR supports, 3 off).”

LINK

[Thanks Amie!]